2006 finally

the past year had been a signifiant year for me , a turning point in my own perspective which i felt i will learn to cherish someone and never take ppl for granted . Sometime i was always looking forward to 2006 because i felt it had been a rewarding year and will be one for me .

For the first time , it is a new year that I managed to spend it with so many friends , ppl , and family .

" Do u know good times are short and I never realised that good times are gone , is there regrets ?"

Was spending my last day in CPF with a bunch of good fren and i never realised that when is the next reunion ? ( han , lawerence , roger , joven , law 's da jie ) Last day was somehow nostalgic about leaving this company that held memories , changes in my life . For once , I felt that what i had took away was the laughters i once missed , the facet of AA , my grace , and the frenships that remains not to mentioned i was gulity abt not bringing suhani's cake for me , my coffeebean pal and ppl like rujeen who always asked me abt lunch , ppl like raihaya & siti who say " GIRL dun be naughty ar " ... and ah law who always said i am " luo ZHI " = haven grow up , act cute again ", Victor who had taught me the meaning of life and being myself staying happy is most impt and listen he said "clara, dun worry u will have alot of options in life " . Not to mentioned my da ge who actually was empathetic toward others , he always like to find someone to chat with nvm hopefully still got victor to accompany him . I missed summer's smile, santha being my problem solver , christine's joke and her hp's gadget sharing:> , rani's laughter and catwalk , chewlian 's bad badtz maru collections , huai hsi's cool sleek attitude and cuteness ., terrence's bidding me all the best and most impt my own boss tsemin ;s act cuteness ... remember she ask wanan to eat panda biscuit ? " and evelyn's motherly concerns on y i need my urgent leave , and last ... my grace , my ai xin breakfast ? ....impt frenships of xiaohan's laughters and sharing problems with her , kevin's gentlemen and being always never failed to settled my help fax , ernest's tactfulness as he volunteered to help me eat my wasabi punishment at sakae , joven 's cuteness being sweet and so my "tai bao" always there to brighten my day with a nice sms n learning to eat veggie more from him . Also , brian who craps too much .

Sometimes , i know i want to get out of my depressed , emotional hijacks and everything . special thanks to my jiemei fatti ping for she is always there when i am bothered by my problem , my love life crisis , my studies stress . Of course , there is adri who is my counsellor ... my special fren .... who is too goal-driven in life to realise those emotions he is lacking . There are also pw ,being the naive kind hearted gf i had:P

To suqi who is so headstrong always , and joyce being contented with her xiao nu ren with zs. To clara myself , i realised seriously i am fragile too , my strongness outlook maybe just to hide those flaws i had .

"don't tell me u r gulity cos u never listens , but think about Why?

it may seem vague and unreal ...... cos ...it no longer matters anymore ...

LOVEREIS ... love is such a painful feeling

stupid downpour

A fine day to work and i encountered law ask me to tabao breakfast for him

did that and then i start printing my lecture handout and everything , there is really like so much to absorb
that i din know where to start

lunch was a plain bowl of fish porridge ... cos i dun feel like eating anything

worst , i forgot to bring my yellow unbrella , a fren got it for me recently ....remind me to keep bringing ...

suddenly feel so feverish now.... was drenched from top to bottam thank to that heavy down pour come so suddenly while i am crossing the road .... and starting to feel weak again . I din had dinner tonight cos i lose my appetite , must be my fever ailing me and gastric juice start pumping up ... i must build up my immune system .sleep ZZZZZZ more .

lovereis .

there goes the christmas !!!

me n my lovely grace :P
ah fen's newly permed hair and hui ping ... looking good :P
me n my beloved cat ... drinking session :P.... lp at the back ... haha... busy
is the lightning at suntec night .? lonely girl on a lonely nite :P
miss our days sapping bubble teas ... peppermint :P
ah qi 's gift come handy ... omg ..:Pmint one haha
mickey hp pouch from xiu yun :>

nice adidas handbag from ant ... thank:> is this limited edition ?hoho
merci choco from pw , so sinful .... sob sob ... gal thank u :>v

" merry christmas to all my frens , thank u for being there with me all these while "

" Love is to let go , if u cherish this person , set them free "....


okie ... recalling memory
guess what had happened , friday night was a bee of activities with the girls ,from the rather lousy tcc cafe ... and then drinking again .

Really regret bringing pw to drink , cos she vomit abit and plus she din feel really well , so sent her home by cab . sorry ..

i got loads of choco and i am getting " rounder n rounder "

see what i get ???

stomach flu ?

workaholic ... dun mess up !!!busy


the study room ? tranqaulity
still figuring out .... how at sis's place ?
haven sleep for the last 24 hours ?


morning , on the way to work and seen like a normal routine day , can't imagine i only have another 7 working days to go . slighlt drizzling , it splashed on my face not once but twice , have i sober up ?

Was grateful to adrian n liping n peiwei / vic/da ge, thank u for being there for me . i am nevertheless still me , i just lose a burden , that is all . come to think of that it was another learning experience that is part and parcel of growing up . Cold blooded as i sound ... i know my ice-cube had melt ... but not to the extend that ...i know there are so many frens out there for me , i shouldn;t disappointed them . okie , deal there goes my day. Let's put our rationale thinking to work , guess it is not all . I miss everything .

i think i caught the flu virus from adri , okie , next time i wun dare to share food with a sick person ... now i got the reddest runny nose and a worst then ever ... health . But i must nurse my health back to pink status cos ... postitive thinking ... get rid of negative element . Adri sms me this morning "mR u feeling ok ?" ok . admit that i finally release the tears i held back for so long . yup did that on a normal monday blues . and to think it was on a night with not much stars to look upon .

and my dear fussy fren insisted on having the white fried carrot cake which i am not able to accomlish my mission other a plate of hokkien mee , be grateful okie !!!

nevertheless , thank u . the weather as i seen had been soothing , time to get to work soon !!!

wake up !!! hey hey ...

merry christmas !

my wish list
1. a cute nice towel to cuddle me
2. nice choco goodie to combat depression
3. one whole bag of green tea
4. 1 super duper nice organiser for schooling
5. wanan a big christmas treat / feast on
6. a whole set of tony parsons books - total got 4
7. any Zara items .... tee ... my fav brand hohoho ....
8. kose essence moisturerP *** bonus .. haha
9. facial paper masks :P
10. what i need is a hot date now ?

schedule again
21th wed , going to get my biscuit from a dear fren tml night
23 th fri- all gals' post x;mas outing
24th - sat x'mas eve ? home ?
25th - sun go fixed my sis's pc ?no life? merry christmas to myself n liping ?
26th - mon meet ah qi and joyce , probably kylie ( yen 's adsence ... sob sob )


my stomach is ailing me .....omg ........ gastric or what ?

lovereis ... santha claus is coming ?

words can't describe what i am feeling now ...

KELLY CLARKSON Because Of You

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you didYou fell so hard
I learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe sideSo I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe sideSo I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust`Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid
I watched you dieI heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cryIn the middle of the night
Over the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you .......lovereis ...... have u loved me ?

I brought my lst phone k750i ...:P

Happy b day to adri wong ..... !!!! all the best in whatever u do ! , sorry din celebrate with ya .

Finally a poor little girl got a new handphone K750i cos her k700i going to perish soon ... no choice gonna to change a new one cos my old one already going to broke down , lucky can trade in or else dunno how broke will i be. actually i intend to get other free phone but ... i still lurve k750i ... no choice i am a super duper sony fan haha ...this is my lst phone i brought myself ... in the past i am lucky one but now i am an independent strong lady ... heihei ...

sat meet lp n catherine, still as pretty as ever but something change about her , that i still feel helpless , but really glad to see her again and i had a deep conversations with her about love life . she had a wonderful smoothing career ahead infact she is someone who yearn for a simple life ... i hope one day she will find her mr. right :P . i had cleared a misunderstanding . I knew Catherine is a brave person , be it one day i will hope there will be someone who treasure and protect her .. my dear fren :P

can;t imagine at the age of 20 years old , so many things had changed ,for me i am no longer the clare i used to be . i guess it had to do with growing up ,entering a new stage of life ,career n studies as a priorities , and family , r/ship .

went on a shopping spree with peiwei , din really spent much , use my metro voucher finally . got myself some tops ...good deal :P .

Got something load off my mind for this moment and i knew i am pessimistic ...like i had ceased existance no more . i wanna to shout out ...." hey clara ... have u wake up?" .

I knew for once I love him .....gambatte dear dear !!!:>

lovereis

its all boil down to pms ....

Recently , some frens commented i look tired and sleepy ...or i always felt i do not have enough time to do alot of things , multitasking . Received a call this morning from zep ... telling me about the next sony roadshow dec 15-18 .... suntec ... my roadshow fever is haunting me again ... still considering cos on 16th i had other commitments - bro's b day , law's wedding and also lectures briefing at 9am .... i got to consider carefully .

I guess it must be pms , stress , loans and everything ... at the moment i dun feel like thinking about other thing , not even how to spend christmas .? A lonely year with or without x'ms no longer matter . I guess i am beginning to detest myself , i simply can;t stop working and to think i eventually think about setting priorities ...i meet pw today and collect my commissions then went meet fabius/jane n give him his share and lastly meet zep ... but i think he misleaded my intentions ... sms me something i dunno how to reply ?

i realised i had seem to grow an immune system to caffine ..........


lastly i went to meet my ex. to get back my stuffs ... from his house ... finally all my belongings are back n intact . i just walk home alone .. feel really great about it .

i realised i am making mistakes in my life ... i realised ..... i am a stupid foolish person , seem to be getting rational day by day .when i reflect on the things i do .... i simply can;t stand ppl who lied ... ppl who is lame , ppl who flirt or even to the extent .... frivilous person ... pls stay away from me .

i yearn for freedom ...and lastly , i know i am uncertain , fickle minded ... individual .
and extremely need someone just to lend me a shoulder .........

and to carol ... i wanan to say " if u really love that someone , n if he did disappoint u before .....try to think that probably he loves u too much ..treasure him".

take care ... lovereis

a walk to remember ...

was dragging myself to work with monday blues ...

emphsizing how time passes ...

was like a normal day when i had to wait for someone till 8 plus ...

and Victor accompany me to walk for an hour and a half

chatted alot ... about life and everything

how i really yearn ....abt the someone lingering my thoughts ...

a really nice walk that perk up my mood ...

helped a couple took their pictures ... how i wished it was me n bri :P

thank u victor :P u r a great fren !!! gambatte ...

for the first time i embraced serenity
lovereis

bNevertheless i stilll miss him like mad .:P

I had a fun time last time meeting the girls , huifen , huiping , liping n me :P . i really miss them all , finally have a chance to chill out with them , i can't imagine what a happening week... that i had no time to blog them down :> we are really a noisy bunch in kster ... can't imagine what happened to me . i wish i was drunk ? haha ... no comment . morning can chat with my dear dear :P infact i was i just hope he would take good care of his health okie :P and dun "work" so hard ..take a rest if u needed ... brian !!! gotten to say i never feel so special with someone like him , thank for being there whenever i need u .

sunday

went to aunt's house and bring the canon ink to sis . she bring me to her "office" , all fully renovated and white blind , really admired her sometime she is too independent already . but i like the zen feel about the place . :P cool ... ar .. sis got me a new sandal from walking culture haha ... then after that went shopping with fatti ping but in the end we din get anything ... for ourselves , at least she got the pair of ear stud :P aquamarine ? ....so glad today was a fun day outing ...went roaming the house with sis .....gambatte ...and lastly gotten "bao" for zep ... haha he say i am darn sweet haha ... nice guy :P a date?

sis say : " at this age , we do need boyfriends but they are just a form of companionship , no longer do u need a man who will bring the bread home . or u give birth for the sake of prolonging a family line " .....sometime i really wish sis will find happiness ... gambatte karen ....

lovereis ... always love brian :P